It's difficult to determine the impact words can make on an individual's life. Some words--good or bad--remain lodged within for an entire life. My guess is that words have both wounded and brought healing to you and you're well aware of the power of the spoken word. Here are some ideas to add more muscle to your conversations:
Choose care over criticism. It's easy to critique and complain—criticism doesn't require much intelligence. It's much more difficult to think about how to verbally care for others. When you care, you soften hearts and open up eyes (and, you'll become better at it too). Go deeper than the surface. If we're being technical, it is encouraging to say something like,
.....| "You don't seem to sweat much for a husky guy."
.....| "You seem smart for a drop out."
.....| "It's really amazing how your pasty white skin shines in the sun."
Don't settle for a superficial word of encouragement when you can dig a little deeper and add meaning to your words. If you need to start by commenting on how someone is dressed… okay, start there but don't stay at the superficial. Keep looking past the surface and you'll move from their clothing to their character—that type of encouragement is memorable and transformational.
A quick aside: Encouragement shouldn't become a substitute for a confrontation that may need to happen. There will be times when you the best thing you can say to a friend may actually sting the recipient. But, when you have a solid relationship that's bathed in encouragement, confrontations are easier and more effective.
Our world is starving for encouragement, what are they hearing from you?
g-ram
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